Sunday, April 06, 2008

The Wall O' Death
You know that grocery stores put the milk and bread in the back of the store for a reason.... right? That reason is that while you are heading back there... to what I charmingly refer to as "The Wall O' Death" aka the decomposing dead carcasses disguised as edibles on styrofoam trays that will break down in I don't know... 600 years? - you may very well add to your cart the byproducts of forced reproduction, AKA cheese, yogurt, butter, and milk, and other highly overpriced "goodies" you didn't realize you needed until they casually entered your viewfinder.... errrr eye sight.
Have you ever considered that the lowest priced generic items are NEVER placed at eye level? Have you ever thought about what they are trying to sell you? Have you given thought number one to how they compel you to buy what they want you to buy? Do you realize they are brainwashing our children in lunchrooms across the country? You are a smart person. Can I count on you to think independently? Can I ask you to think for yourself? I hope so.
Dinner on the Vegan Fly
No word yet from ApplianceRepairGuy, cryptic or otherwise, so my objective remains to not add to the spoilage. Indeed, I used the half container of extra firm tofu to its' fullest potential by slicing and saute'ing in Liquid Smoke and Tamari, thereby converting it to BACNot! Also on last night's agenda was a "roughing it" sort of Yukon Gold potato bake that impersonated those cheesy bits of goodness masquarading as food in the "easy to prepare" and "easy to get you to part with hard earned money" departments of the GrossATeria. Aforementioned easy cheesy potato bake consisted of parboiled Yukons sliced about 1/4 inch thick, combined with a shaken (not stirred) melange' of rice milk, (about one of the little tiny ones) a couple tablespoons of that flour for making gravy, three slices of vegan Jack Cheese and a bit of pepper. Add some paprika, and toss in the ubernuker, and minutes later - Voila!
So.... today's lunch was leftovers from yesterday in the form of a NOTBlt, delish! and some of the potatoes. Dinner was the rest of the potatoes (I KNOW but I can't STAND to toss food!) with a spinach salad that was topped with some more of the BACNot! and some beets, olives, and other goodies. This fridge on fritz is wearing thin.... But I'm so not bitching, I'm grateful for the opportunity to see how creative I can be. Film at eleven.
Yet Another Advantage to Going Vegan
The refrigerator is on its' last legs and the repair guy is as sharp as a bowling ball. I noticed the frozen foods were not so much frozen as just cold. I called the repair guy, and he sent his understudy, a big young man who proudly announced he'd recently consumed some McTrash of pork wrapped in fat, dipped in lard (I'd guess) and deep fried. Oh, and add a side of fat drenched potatoes on the side.
His assessment was that the defrost biz needed to be replaced. I should take all the food out, and let it defrost, and he'd have the part the next day. Well, I did what he suggested, and put the food in ice in a cooler. The next day another call produced new info that indeed - it would be Tuesday before the part was in, and I could safely put the food back in and all would be well now that it was defrosted.....
It wasn't. The good news is that although I lost some vegan sausages, patties, and a few dishes I'd made and frozen, nothing died in vain. I can only imagine how dreadful it would have been to throw away meat and dairy - to have another sentient being give up its' life only to be tossed in the trash because a refrigerator gave up the ghost.